Gaslight

Do you know the movie 'Gaslight'? Essentially, I don't either. But I do know that it is a joke in my family. One spouse tries to fool the other spouse into believing they are from Crazytown. Speaking of Crazytown....vacuum cleaner on the couch? For self-help see Quirks.

We just sat down in front of the TV this evening (and the Cable company just reprogrammed the cable box in front of our eyes) with a big ginormous bowl of organic locally grown popcorn. I took a bite and bit into a metal washer. What the? *Steve* was shaving his head in the laundry room, a Sunday night tradition, when *Mila* burst in. "DAD! EXCUSE ME DAD! Mom was eating popcorn and all of a sudden she had a metal ring in her mouth." *Mila* came back out and explained that while Dad was cooking the popcorn the lid fell apart and he couldn't find all the parts to the lid, so he decided to leave it to our fate as the girls of the house to bite into it.

Earlier in the day my mother had commented on how thin my face looked and wondered if I had lost a ton of weight. For a moment there I thought Did I? Did my arse just slide off when I was on the treadmill this week? Unfortunately not. My arse is still there and so are my giant Icelandic gams. Viking legs, if you will. I had to ask *Steve* what his opinion was on the new hairdo.

Me: My mom thinks I look skinnier with the new hairdo and she's worrying that I lost 10 pounds overnight or something. I know I haven't lost any weight.

*Steve*: No. You didn't lose any weight.

-uncomfortable silence goes here-

*Steve*: It's definitely the hairdo. Yeah, it's just the hairdo. You didn't lose any weight.

Me: What were you saying earlier about how you were going to scrub the toilets? Uh huh!

signed, the willow