For familytree Friday:
At the risk of bringing heaviness into this blog, today I submit a story of a family member who has now departed this earthly terrain. The best way I can think of to do this is to reprint in part, the eulogy which I had prepared some eight years ago.
Eulogy for *Tad*
If *Tad* had the opportunity to attend this gathering today, he, simply, WOULDN”T !
And in his gruff, impatient way, he would accuse us of being “sentimental” and “morbid”.
For *Tad’s* life was a life of usefulness, peppered with humour and thinly-disguised love. He simply had no time for sitting around weeping over things which cannot be changed. *Tad*, as we all know, was a “fixer”. Is there any one of us here for whom he has not, at some time or another “fixed” something?
At the risk of bringing heaviness into this blog, today I submit a story of a family member who has now departed this earthly terrain. The best way I can think of to do this is to reprint in part, the eulogy which I had prepared some eight years ago.
Eulogy for *Tad*
If *Tad* had the opportunity to attend this gathering today, he, simply, WOULDN”T !
And in his gruff, impatient way, he would accuse us of being “sentimental” and “morbid”.
For *Tad’s* life was a life of usefulness, peppered with humour and thinly-disguised love. He simply had no time for sitting around weeping over things which cannot be changed. *Tad*, as we all know, was a “fixer”. Is there any one of us here for whom he has not, at some time or another “fixed” something?
*Tad* turned his mind and his hand to many tasks, and using this gift, he could repair and produce almost anything from wooden buildings to barrels of sauerkraut ! He seldom refused a request for assistance in any area and all we had to do in return was listen to his complaints and lectures. More than just a man; *Tad* was an “institution” in our family….a Legend, almost. It seemed like he was always there to help out in any way that he could.
When eulogizing a man’s life; listing his accomplishments seems necessary, but honouring the “man” is the most important detail.
What kind of “man” was this, whom we come today to recognize and thank? For truly, in writing this, the most important fact we must convey, is that *Tad* was a MAN…our “main man” - our husband, son, father, grandfather, brother, uncle, nephew, friend.
An old Tribal Proverb advises: “Gather the five virtues, then you are a man.”
The five virtues named are: dignity, confidence, courage, compassion and faith.
To say that *Tad* had dignity would make him chuckle, but we have all witnessed this virtue in him. *Tad* was a solitary man. He did not need other people to define his worth. He walked alone, but while doing so, he acquired the respect and friendship of all who were attracted by his humour and dignity.
Confidence? Ever see *Tad* operate a back-hoe? or a hammer? or a fishing rod ?
Courage? This is a chapter of *Tad*’s life which merits a full eulogy of its own. “Roll with the punches” was a phrase invented for him alone. Because, “punches” he had in abundance; and “roll” he definitely did! Who else could drive himself to hospital after a tree had just introduced itself to his face? (and then he was annoyed because the surgeon didn’t respond to his jokes, while “sewing him up”). Drove himself to hospital after his first heart attack too! And, as for the train accident, which eventually left him with only one leg - the full experience belies telling! *Tad's* full show of courage was demonstrated immediately after the accident and in the endless months of repair afterward. This sad event gave him the opportunity to give birth to many “one-legged man” jokes; while his plastic legs became another source of humour for *Tad*. Did you know you could make a beer stein from a prosthesis ?
The fourth virtue is compassion. The dictionary defines compassion as “sorrow for the distress of another, with the desire to help.” For, beyond *Tad*’s gruff exterior, dwelt a “pussy-cat” and that’s NOT to be confused with “push-over” !
Faith? Somewhere there are photos of *Tad* as a 14 year-old altar boy. But, faith isn’t always displayed in a church, and *Tad*’s faith in life was held outdoors in God’s world – preferably with a fishing pole in his hand !
“ Life With *Tad* ”….. It could be the title of a book and the stories would fill a million pages. Someone said; “If life hands you lemons..make lemonade.” Life with *Tad* was like lemonade…bitter/sweet, but nutritious and refreshing ! For some years now, we have felt that *Tad* was a spirit held in a beleaguered body. It seemed as if, he held inside himself, a restless bird longing to go free. Death has freed that bird; and while we mourn our loss, we know that we will find our *Tad*, beside us, above us, surrounding us, protecting us, as he always has done. We are grateful for the years and all the special, precious moments we spent with him and pray that he can now, truly, rest in peace, with all our love to abide with him forever.
signed, the willow (for the Lady of the Lake)
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